Church Membership Interview

On December the 5^th I finally made it to my membership interview for Moody Church. It felt like the culmination of a lifetime came full circle. The interview was very straightforward. The most important question was also the most memorable. The deacon asked me, “If you were to die today, why should God allow you to go to heaven?” My answer was “I believe in Jesus Christ. If I can’t make it through Jesus Christ, then there is no other way.”

I was told that my name would go on the bulletin for a couple of weeks before I was presented as a new member. I have no rush. I’ve waited a lifetime for this moment. I feel very good about joining Moody Church. Moody Church is different and it is the kind of church all other churches should be like. No one forced me to join. No one was pressuring me or breathing down my neck trying to convince me to join. No one intimidated me that I would be going to hell if I did not join them. No one told me that Moody was the best church there is. For me it is about no more cults, no more false teachers, or deceptions. Since I was kid many wolves in sheep's clothing came wanting to devour me, but all these years God kept them at bay.

I will pray that God guides me in this new phase in my life and that God uses me to continue to share his love and saving grace with others.

Coping With Miscarriages

I returned to church today, a week after we suffered a second an unexpected miscarriage. A year and a half ago my wife suffered her fist miscarriage. It was a terrible feeling for both of us. I never thought that the passing of an unborn child could hurt so much. It is a terrible experience to go through and enduring it a second time is too much to bear. For both children we went to the motions of getting excited, eager to prepare for the baby’s arrival and then when we least expected it, God did not allow it to happened. Many parents who suffer through this always ask themselves why? Is it medical? Was there something that we could have done to prevent it? Will we see them again? And where could they be now? As head of the family nothing has made me feel more of a loser than the loss of our unborn children. As men we are genetically programmed to be the providers and protectors of our families. A father will die for his children in a split second. We will not give it a second thought. We are supposed to make the scary things go away and when we fail, it will eat us alive for the rest of our live.

Losing my second baby hurt me--again. But I have learned to move on. When we learned about the pregnancy I went to church to thank God and pray for this baby to be born healthy. Today I returned to add a sense of closure to the ordeal. King David did the same before he lost his son. He prayed and begged God to spare the life of the child. He would not eat, or even bathe. When he finally got the news about his baby’s passing he returned to his normal life.

In 2 Samuel 12: 21 His servants asked him, "Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that the child is dead, you get up and eat!"

22 He answered, "While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, 'Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let the child live.' 23 But now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me."

I have also gotten comfort and peace of mind because I know that our baby, like our fist baby is with Jesus Christ. They are in a far better place that the earth. In the bible Jesus said

"Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.“ Luke 18:17.

Our babies went with Jesus Christ. They are in his Kingdom. As a Christian father I know that I will see them. They cannot come to me, but I will go to them. As a Christian I cannot despair and beat myself over the head, constantly double guessing myself. God has not left me alone. God has given me the comfort I need to overcome this trial.

My Personal Road to Christianity

My Road to Christianity

Originally published on 12/21/09

Even as I youth I was always in search for the truth.

In keeping with the overall theme of my blog, for the next couple of posts I will write about how and why I found my way back to Christianity. I will start with my high school years. Like many teenagers I had internal questions about which was the true faith. Catholicism, although many will not agree, is still Christian, but it is Christianity in its rawest form. Unfortunately, it did not give me all the answers my spirit was seeking. Chicago is a spiritual melting pot and I was exposed to many beliefs which included faiths like the Jehovah’s Witnesses and Islam.

Although I was born into it, Catholicism did not afford me guidance.

I studied with a group of Jehovah’s Witnesses for about two years. A high school friend introduced me to them. We would meet weekly in the Albany Park Library. But I never became a Witness because I saw many red flags about their teachings. First, they claim that all the translations of the Bible were wrong, except theirs. So you could not read any other version. Second, they played too much with the prophetic years of 1914 and 1975 and what they were prophesying never came to pass. Third, they did not want to be part of many traditions and customs of this world. You could not celebrate birthdays with birthday cakes because they considered it a pagan custom. Also, I have yet to see a Kingdom Hall building with any windows. What are they hiding? What gives??? Fourth, they did not believe in decorating your home with Christmas ornaments and/or Christmas trees. Fifth, they did not believe in blood transfusions--even to save a life because they believe that God forbade the eating of blood. When I raised the issue that eating involved the act of chewing and swallowing, and not eating through a vein, they did not agree. And neither did I agree with their beliefs. The organization makes millions of dollars a year.  I don’t understand why their followers fail to see this. So much for not wanting to be part of this world.

Soon after my break up with this group a different friend introduced me to Islam.

Why Am I a Christian?

Why am I a Christian?

Why not? Why shouldn't I be a Christian? I am a Christian because God has abundant grace. I fall everyday. But God never fails to pick me up. I am my own worst critic. I know sin is wrong but like an addict I keep taking it in. And like an addict I feel the all-consuming sting of guilt and remorse. To tell you I am perfect is not telling you the truth. That would be concealing a greater deception. A greater lie. I am imperfect. That is why I need Jesus Christ. His love and mercy restores the health of my soul. He forgives me and He never loses faith that one day...one majestic, merciful day... I will never fall again.

Coming Home

By Juan Fernandez

I have come home. No. I’m not referring to coming back home from the Philippines after a two months hiatus. I am referring to finally finding my ‘spiritual home‘. Today was my first time visiting The Moody Church in Chicago. I did not think that I was going to like it. But I did. After so many years of searching for a place of worship coming to Moody felt just right.

Appropriately Dr. Erwin W. Lutzer’s message was based on Acts-27-28, which described how Paul and his followers survived a very tumultuous storm in the sea. Dr. Lutzer stated that in our own lives we will always face storms that toss us around, from side to side, up and down. I felt that his message was speaking to me.

For many years I had been in a boat, roaming the sea aimlessly. Always enduring, suffering pain and anguish through many storms of my life. I traveled to many cities in the US, even other countries like Mexico and the Philippines, trying to find a place of worship I could call my own. Yet, I did not know that God always wanted me to come back home--to Chicago. The first time I saw The Moody Church was when I was 14 years old and I came to see Gremlins the movie, in the now closed Village Theater.

As I got older I would drive by this same neighborhood when going downtown. In 2004 my dream came true, I was part of a major art exhibit in the Chicago Historical Museum. Amazingly, four years earlier I attended the exhibit of my all time favorite artist, Norman Rockwell.

The Chicago History Museum as Moody Church casts a shadow

When I came to the Norman Rockwell exhibit there was Moody Church, just across the street. I remember gazing at the church building as I entered and left the museum. I cannot imagine how different my life would have been had I paid attention. Everything would have been so very different.

This is the bus ride that took me to the door steps of the Moody Church

But still I am so very happy. Overjoyed at the future prospects. I thank God for bringing me home…

“….Precious Lord, I love Your name, when I look back from whence I came;
Sometimes stumbling, sometimes falling, sometimes alone.
Friends and loved ones I love so dear---many are gone, but still I’m here.
Take my hand, precious Lord, and lead me on.”
---Thomas A. Dorsey

Exercise with True Results

Manila Skyline

I cannot believe I now weigh 155 lbs. When I first started this blog I documented that at 5' 7", I weighed in excess of 165lbs. That was back in the Spring. However much of my workout was done inside our apartment because the weather was terrible until last week, when it started to get warm. My basic "every-other-day" workout routine consisted of 300 steps, 100 sit-ups, 100 jumping jacks and 100 push-ups. A few times I was too lazy to even exercise. So last week I jogged 15 minutes everyday along the lake. What has been startling for me is that although I did exercise with my stepper, push-ups, and sit-ups, I really did not push myself. I'm happy with the results thus far. I'll maintain my weight at the point when I loose most of my "lovehandles".

On another note, we may be heading out to the Philippines some time soon. I hear that there are some new missionary outposts helping the natives. If I'm close enough to them I will visit and take some pics and report back.

Natural Healing Cures from God

I'm messed up--so to speak. Well, not too bad. It's just that I have a few physical conditions I need to shake up. I have a foot fungus and stretch marks I need to fix. As a teacher I work in an environment which does not help my nail infection heal. It has gotten better over the past few months, but when the hot weather comes around. Bang! It's like going to square one. Additionally when I was high school age I used to do a lot of sit ups. These sit ups created some nasty stretch marks on my back.

This morning when I noticed that my toe nail fungus was returning, I took some Vitamin E oil and drenched it. Additionally I used it on my stretch marks. Health nuts claim that it works. We'll see.

I know God has given us the cure to everything on this earth, but if we don't study the Bible and read it everyday, our spirituality, like our health, dwindles. So one lesson I learned is to keep at it.

This morning I also ordered a slew of health products:

Cinnamon--which is good for diabetes, inhibits bacteria growth, blood clots and arthritis
Garlic--fights fungus, hypertension, and vampires.
Arnica Cream--better than that autrocious stuff called Ben-Gay
Aloe Vera Gel--for styling my hair. I' no longer putting that crazy petroleum based gel made with cancer causing chemicals.

Toady we were invited to a Christina couples conference close by our house. We are going to learn about Christ and to strengthened our marriage. I hope to report what happened in my next post. Until next time

Virtues of a Christian Spouse

I used to go to a Korean church in Chicago that believed in arranged marriages. They called it “marriage by faith”. The way it worked was that your bible teacher or head pastor would recommend someone for you to marry and you were strongly encouraged to marry them. This Korean church was very authoritarian. They followed a Confucius concept of obeying. I did not believe in that. That is one of many reasons why I left this church. I always had the desire to marry someone that God placed in my path.

It was very important for me to marry a Christian woman. It really did not matter to me what denomination, as long as they were Christian and God fearing. As a Christian couple, like many other marriages, we go through our ups and downs. It is not easy. But I cannot imagine how much harder it is to marry someone who is not from your faith. It is even worse I believe, if they do not even believe in God. 

I married a Christian because of the following reasons.

Honesty, helpfulness and caring.

A calmer temperament.

Most likely no promiscuous behavior prior to marriage (although no one is perfect).

No alcohol or use of drugs

Not materialistic.

Faithful, loving, family oriented.

Prayerful

Most Christians should adopt the qualities of Jesus Christ. Jesus is loving, sacrificial, tender, peaceful, patient, kind, resolute and above all, forgiving. These are just a few of the qualities of a Christian spouse. To those who are seeking or young, do not rush things. Have faith in God. He will give you the desire of your heart. I got married in my early 30’s. It was God's time--the perfect time.

Addiction: Alcohol and Meth

Gluttony is the over-indulgence and over-consumption of food, drink, or intoxicants to the point of waste.

This past Wednesday, before going to work I had to stop by a Jewish school to get some books they were donating to our school library. I had to park in a parking meter but because I had no change with me to feed the meter I ran to the nearest Walgreen’s. To my dismay sitting in front of the store was a homeless young man begging for money. He was no older than 25 years, wearing black shorts and a gray shirt with stubble on his face. As I passed by him he asked me for money and when I ignored him he said something that perturbed me “God bless you sir.”

Upon my return I had to ask him about his situation. Normally I do not talk to people on the streets but I just needed to know why he was there. “What is wrong with you?” I asked him. “You are young and in this condition?” Thinking that he was going to try to lie he was instead very blunt. He told me he was a "meth" addict. His addiction had caused him to lose his job and his home. He also got thrown out of the rehab clinic and he was begging for money to support his eleven dollar a day habit. He said “I’m f---ed up, man.” I did not know what to say. I was thinking that he was just a lazy bum. But instead he had a very bad addiction that had ruined his life. Thoughts raced through my head. What would Jesus do in this case? How could Jesus help someone who was addicted to chemicals? It sounded like a very tough situation.

But then God made me think. Why am I judging this man? None of us are perfect. Most of us will not be addicted to illegal drugs. But I do not think anyone is exempt from being addicts to the things that cause us to sin and separate us from God. Even non-drug addictions have the potential to destroy our lives. Some people may be addicted to watching television, listening to music, gambling, drinking, eating, porn and even blogging. For sometime I too was caught in the clutches of addiction. It took me awhile before I managed to take control of my situation. I needed to identify my problem and then ask God to help me. At times reading the bible helped me a little. Going to church also helped me. But it was not enough. Then, all of a sudden I just had to turned to Jesus, as trivial as it may sound to some, that is what I did. I said, “Jesus, you are the only one that has the power to set me on the right track. I don’t know what else to do.” Up until this day whenever temptations start to lurk I just think about Jesus Christ and my temptations leave. It is true.

I was not able to share this with the young man because he saw a Chicago Police car and he had to leave the place or risk getting arrested. Although I did learn a valuable lesson. Even chemical addictions may sound too hard to overcome but God has power we cannot comprehend. A key verse that surmises all of this is Eph 5:18-20 which says "And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit.” If we allow the Holy Spirit to help us, he will. He will keep all the bad addictions away.

I'm Not Sorry for Being a Christian!

I’m not going to apologize to anyone for being a Christian. For what? Why should I apologize to the world? Should I apologize for loving Christ because he died for my sins and he saved a wretched like me? Should I apologize for knowing Jesus Christ and experiencing great freedom deep within my heart and soul? Have I committed a crime for not compromising my faith, or reconciling it with other faiths?

Society as a whole has reprimanded us Christians by telling us not to wear Christianity on our sleeves. It is bad---they say. You might offend those that are not Christian. They say "don’t pray, don’t say to anyone at work or in the street that you are Christian." Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior openly preached in the streets. He was outnumbered, but he did not care about what the people would say. If Jesus was not apologetic, neither will I be!

People are being beaten publicly within an inch of their lives for petty legalisms. Unborn babies are being killed by the hundreds and thousands across the world. Kids are shooting each other in the streets. And we should apologize for being Christian? Let’s be for real! Let us shout to the world that we are Christian and that we follow the true Prince of Peace. Accept no cheap imitations!

Amen

The Swine Flu and Christianity

The first school in Chicago to report swine flu case.

With the spread of the H1N1 virus one of the things I have been thinking a lot about is infestations in the church. All the churches in Mexico have been closed. Some schools across the country have been closed as well. One of these schools is Kilmer Elementary in Chicago, which I might add is a few blocks away from where we live and reported the very first case of swine flu in Chicago. Loyola University which is also in Rogers Park had a student with swine flu. So these cases are really hitting home.

The last time I was in the Baptist Church of Rogers Park, we did the handshake thing, as well as communion, where people eat a small wafer and drink from small cups. When I was growing up Catholic back in the 70’s I would see about 100 people all drink ‘wine’ from the same cup! Even at that young age seeing that grossed me out. Maybe that is why I’ve never participated in Holy Communion. But then again what are other Christians to do during these times? I do not have an answer. Just many questions. I’ve been avoiding large gatherings like the plague--pun intended. Including church.

My Princess strolling through the courtyard.

About two years ago my daughter got very sick with what the doctor said was hand, foot, and mouth disease, caused by the Coxsackie virus. Seeing my princess suffer through such an ordeal broke my heart to pieces. She had painful blisters and a high fever for at least 5 days. When thinking about it, she either got it at the playground (highly unlikely because it was winter time) or the play toys in another church we used to attend. I was very upset to say the least. And that is the thing, most people are careless and inconsiderate. And unfortunately, we Christians are not exempt from these bad habits. We should know better. If I had a penny for every time I saw an adult sneeze or cough in front of me without covering their face I would be a rich man. Truly disgusting! If the swine flu becomes a true pandemic, God forbid, I hope people start getting arrested on the spot for spreading their germs.

It may sound trivial but President Barack Obama was right, the key to stopping the spread of these communicable diseases is for people to have common sense, common courtesy and at least a trickle of decency for hygiene. Just a trickle. Because asking for more is just asking for too much.